The photo I didn't take

September 11, 2001, what a gorgeous day it was.

I was in Cleveland, a young second class petty officer, just beginning my day. I had just finished my news clip search and it was going to be a light day. There were officer-in-charge boards going on in our conference room down the hall. We had the television bank on as we always did.

I remember hearing it and it barely registering, "A plane has struck the World Trade Center." I looked up and saw the images that will always be ingrained in the mind of anyone who saw them that day.

I remember trying to get news on CNN.com and the website not working. When I did get on I printed out whatever news was the latest and posted it on our bulletin board in the hallway.

I remember being glued to the TV and wondering between the command center and our office gathering information about what was happening and passing it on to others.

I remember calling my mom and checking on her in Chicago and worrying about friends in New York.

I remember the photo I wish I had taken but couldn't bring myself to. In the grand scheme of things it wouldn't have mattered much, just a moment in time. We had people from other offices coming in to watch the news, not many, only three or four besides us. Our lieutenant was standing in his doorway and the chief in his. The bright, beautiful day was silhouetting them there as we all watched. This small group of Coast Guardsmen, paused in a moment of time watching our world change before our eyes.

On that day the service I joined changed forever, my country changed. I don't know what was going through everyone's mind that day, I can barely remember what went through mine.

I will never forget the silence as we evacuated our building, one plane was still flying, coming very close to our building before turning back towards Washington, and no one knew what was going to happen with it.

I will never forget that gathering of Coast Guardsmen, pausing to observe a moment in history, around a public affairs office and a 13-inch television. A photo I have seared in my mind if not on film.